Happy?? Birthday...

When names are popular in Arabic culture, they are VERY popular. As such, most of the members on our school staff are named Aisha, Moza, or Mariam and conversations can sometimes come to a hilarious standstill when the western teachers are trying to understand who each other are talking about.

For example:

Teacher 1: I was so cheesed off (I cleaned up the language for the blog) when Moza came and interrupted my class today!
Teacher 2: Which Moza?
Teacher 1: You know the one who sits in the first office...bigger lady...
Teacher 2: What does she wear?
Teacher 1: A black abaya.... (silent stares, followed by laughter. That is what EVERYONE here wears. That's like describing a business man in America by saying he wears a black suit)
Teacher 3: Oh I know who you are talking about, but that's not Moza, that's Aisha!
Teacher 1: Really? I thought it was Moza. She's a bigger lady, and she's the one who is... (now here you fill in the blank describing her make-up and temperament-the only two things you can use to describe an Arab woman who is covered up to her neck)
Teacher 4: No, actually I think that's Mariam you are talking about.
Teacher 3: Which Mariam, there are 3 down there...
Teacher 1: *face palm*

Now this is not to suggest that all Arab women look, act or are the same. But, it is very easy to confuse these women, when there are so few personality markers on their person and because there are over 100 of them at our school and because we cannot interact with many of them as they are Arabic-only speakers. They are keeping this confusing tradition alive and strong by naming their young girls the same name. I have 4 Salamas in my one class.

***

Althought our students drive us CRAZY sometimes, at heart they are extremely sweet. One of my colleagues (who I know wouldn't mind me blogging about her experience-that's why I do it..) had a birthday this week. Her students prepared a secret surprise party for her complete with food, cake and several pricey gifts. She had briefly mentioned her birthday once a long time ago when the students asked and they had noted it down and waited. Unfortunately another member of the staff at our school came in to the room before my friend and got upset that the students didn't "do this for her"-meaning bring this other teacher gifts and throw them a party. In a temper tantrum, this person went to our school's administration and told them the girls had set up an unauthorized party, and administration came and took everything from the students. So, because of one woman's immature jealousy, these kind-hearted young girls had to explain to my friend what happened to her party. Luckily, they managed to keep 6 bags of gifts they wanted to give her by hiding them. My friend, who I assume was both touched and equally enraged (as I was!) posted her story on a teacher's facebook page and what resulted was a comment war between teachers about whether or not the other teacher's behaviour was merely immaturity and jealousy, a "woman thing" or a cultural thing. I always stay out of these kinds of heated conversations because there ain't nothing like an angry teacher to rip you apart with words, especially when sitting behind the comforting, soft glow of a computer screen.

I do have something to say about behaviour and culture, though. Yes, this culture is VERY different from North American culture(s) and it is sometimes frustrating and sometimes wonderful. However, I do not like people to hide behind their culture (or religion) and claim to do something because it's what everyone does. Americans have the reputation of being rude and unyielding on a world scale, yet I work with a group of amazing American women, and I rarely see any difference between us other than when they talk about Obama..and I say "eh!" too much. I do understand that American and Canadian culture are closely linked, but many Canadians would like to think that we are far above Americans in manners for example. This is absolutely not so. I will never think that my coworker is doing or saying something "because they are American" but I will instead think about them as a person, and assess why they are doing or saying something. Makes sense right? By the same token, going to administration in a bitter, jealous, rage and ruining both a surprise birthday party and student's time, effort and money is not a cultural thing. I have seen Emirati people to be gracious, calm, generous, kind people in many instances. I have also seen them to be petty, rude and unforgiving-as I have people in my own and other cultures. My point? Okay, i'll finally get there...I might be on a cultural rant here. Behaviour is a personal choice and while it is INFLUENCED by culture it is not controlled by it and a different culture is no excuse for bad manners and petty behaviour. Except if you try to get in the way of a Canadian and their Tim Hortons. Then any wild, unruly behaviour is totally acceptable and is "cultural" :o)